Showing posts with label At The Office. Show all posts
Showing posts with label At The Office. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Name That Corpse Flower



Remember the lovely Lois that made the news last year?


If waiting for a flower to bloom with the stench of death isn't cool enough, this year the Houston Museum of Natural Science is making it fun by letting the public vote on the new flower's name. That's nerdy cool if you ask me!

I'm torn between Clark and Hermann.


I guess Clark was suggested because of Lois and Clark. You know, the famous expeditionists? Just kidding. More like Superman. And I just think it's kind of an unexpected name for a corpse flower. Hermann is the second choice as this unnamed beauty will be a resident of Hermann Park.

I just decided that 'Clark' is a little too Rico Suave for a corpse flower. Hermann's more like it.

Meanwhile, I have my own corpse flower situation going on at work. I was hoping that maybe with a change in office, I would also be turning over a new leaf in regards to my skills as a botanist. Let's just say I'm still trying to find my inner George Washington Carver.

It needs to be taken out, but look it still has green leaves at the bottom! I had to hide it under my desk when a visitor came in yesterday. I'm waiting until this weekend to bring it back home to finish out its final days.


I'm no longer naming my plants. It's just too painful.


Meanwhile, go rock the vote!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

How To Win Friends & Influence Officemates



I owe you a big update. I announce a month ago that I have a new job and then the only thing that I post is about vacuum cleaners. Lame, I know.


Sometimes there's just too much to say and too little time to say it. And besides, when I'm stressed I post about random things that don't matter. Like how I love looking at the dirt bin of a vacuum cleaner. It's my comfort post.


Things have been going great at the new job, but very very busy. I am heading up our company's marketing and am, in fact, our only marketing employee. I'm hoping to change that in the future, but for now I'm it!


I've discovered a few universal truths to making friends in any new office environment:


  1. When trying to make friends with other women in the office, bring up the thermostat. Not much in common to talk about? "Geez, it's cold in here. Wish I would've brought my snuggie." Bam and you're in. Women unite around a good complaint about the office temperature.



  2. Chocolate is a universal language. I have strategically placed a bowl of Hershey's chocolate kisses right by the door to my office. They have no choice but to come in and say hello to the new employee. If Pavlov would've used chocolate in his experiments, he would have had faster results. Oh wait, he used dogs. Nevermind then, scratch that - he was using meat.



  3. Drop a few comments about having dogs here and there to see who bites. If there are a few dog lovers in the house, you're automatically cool. At least with the dog people. Note - do not bring up Pavlovian experiments using chocolate. This will not fair well with dog lovers and you will be looked at with a wary eye for the rest of your tenure.



  4. Put a brightly colored exotic plant on your desk. There's a little bit of hummingbird in all of us. People will come by to admire it the first day and as in my case, thereafter, to slowly watch it's demise and offer helpful tips about how to possibly nurse it back to health.



  5. Wear brightly colored clothes. See previous tip regarding hummingbirds.

Now that you have these tips in your back pocket, go make friends with your officemates. I promise the world of successful scissor and hole puncher borrowing will open up to you!